who will love the little sparrow...will no one write her eulogy?

The common sparrow

I give thanks for this cheerful bird

ordinary and messy in its nest building

but a tenacious caretaker of its young

And it is nests in my birdhouses

I love to pass by the nursery and hear the peeps

calling for mom or dad

...hungry mouths sometimes reaching their soft yellow beaks out

of the entry

When I stop and speak to them they pull in and mother usually

sits in a branch, mouth full of small moth...and waits

I speak to her too

Don't worry mom...I'm going..thank for nesting here

in my Open Bar of Joy

Sparrows are the birds I remember while growing up in Chicago

No vast gardens in my neighborhood

but the sparrows were always there for this little girl

sometimes dozens of them perching in a snowball bush

chirping so loudly that my grandfather complained

about the noise and the feather and other stuff mess that they left behind

But I loved their cheeriness

...part of my budding love for birds and all things of nature

And then there was the despised pigeon that roosted on the electric wires

in the alley....I loved their cooing in late afternoon sun

This I had to keep to myself....Grandma hated them

I don't hate anything

I now see these poor birds as the underclass of the bird world

brought here by humans.....trying to survive

yes, they are messy....but that must be their way...encased in their genes

and humans brought them here to this foreign environment

and learned to adapt

humans....always messing with things

I will never forget the time I saw one dead in a parking lot

and its mate kept poking it trying to stir it

it did it for an hour

We are all connected in this universe

surely, we must have empathy and concern for such suffering

even in a lowly bird

So this morning I was glad this sparrow

perched and looked at me and posed

 a prince to me

JOY

There is always wonder in the garden

even on the bleakest days

It's my attitude that must be adjusted

to allow me to open up

and see

hear

feel

smell

touch it

I wish you could hear the wind bell

so ethereal

I wish you could see the light

illuminating this glass star

or wish that you could smell the wet earth

one of the gardens best fragrances

It is getting colder each day...but on Thanksgiving it will be 58!

the Creator gives

I must open to receive

The little chickadee in the Alder tree

sings away....chick-a-dee-dee-dee

...better than Pavarotti

...my heart wide open

expanding

It was a delightful sunny,windy afternoon.

...whirling leaves, bending boughs

blustery bird wings

ahhh

and shadow...that glorious companion of light

This may be the best part of season change

the change in light

almost as if it is sent to distract us from the ordinary duties of the garden

Who cares about anything else while in the garden when slanted glorious rays of sun

are penetrating through the ordinary debris of summer?

Oh and the sky was so blue and the wind made itself known by its sound

I just stood and listened to its serenade

Okay, I'm in love...

I too will turn and face the sun

perch awhile, let my ruffled feathers settle down,

sit in the blue of the sky

Little red feathers...

 help me see the swelling bud

 just at the end of the branch

The maple shed her leaves
they gathered around her like a fallen gown
smitten instantly by autumn
true and utter love in his arms

Not just a tree rat,but a ward

 

I have been without a computer...oh woe

I hope someone has cared, for isn't that the fun of blogging?

The garden is almost put to sleep; we have had some glorious warm days

mingled in with the blasty windy days and chilly nights

This morning I spotted Boo staring out of the patio door

his body rigid ....hmmmm...means something

So I wandered over and sure enough, there it was ..a mouse

hiding behind a remaining flower pot

He was munching on a sunflower seed

unaware of Boo watching his every move

It hasn't been a good week in the garden for me...

one night ago I looked out on the yard before turning in for the night...

I always do.....sometimes I catch a raccoon walking by or a possum

or who knows what else......I love that the wild loves my garden

Well, I spotted two kinds of fur rumbling just beyond the deck....

then I spotted what was a squirrel tail flying around with a possum tail

oh no!

I ...without thinking...ran outside to break up the fight (I have been known to do that with humans too :0 )

but the possum wouldn't let go....so I banged and shouted..until he scampered away

I searched for the squirrel in the dark....couldn't find him

went inside to get a flashlight.....found him.....curled up in a fetal position....a tiny little squirrel

oh dear.....

I covered him with a large flower pot so the possum wouldn't find him

But in the morning he was stretched flat out on the ground under the pot

dead

Oh my little ward...all night I lay awake thinking of ways I could help you in the morning

thinking of which crazy vet would look at you

think of ways to build a nest in the tree to put you in

thinking of everything in order to not feel the great sadness

that I would feel in the morning

I just confess to being a lover of animals...all animals

they are a gift for me from God...they have seen me through many a sad time

they bring me joy.....

I hoped all night

...hope

a great thing God has hardwired in me

but this time he said ...no

My little ward was dead in the morning

I buried him under leaves...I think he would of liked that...

my husband will never understand how hard I take

the well being and death of an animal

....I have been like this since I was little...bandaging a garter snake that had been cut

by a lawnmower.....a band-aide bandage on a snake...really

I lost a moment of joy in my open bar of joy

but I always give into the new moment

and joy is always there

..now how do I tell that little mouse that Harry Hawk

loves mice...and would love to meet him? 

safe journey my little friend

While raking, I looked up and saw light

passing through the Japanese Maple leaves

I stopped and beheld

ah...the garden keeps giving

Sometimes I think

heaven opens 

and we see a bit of it

or feel it 

or taste it

It is in the slant of light

illuminating the colors of the leaf

in late afternoon

and in the smell of the earth

wet from a rain

almost fooling me to think
 it could be spring,that is the new life guest
 soon to arrive

The wind has blown warm a few times lately

stopping me at the store, in the parking lot,

stopping me to look at lowly pigeons

scurrying around for bits of nourishment

in the scattered debris of human consumption

Lowly pigeons sharing in the illusion of Springtime

in the throws of Autumn

Soon it will be bitter and the daylight will be shorter

and I will scurry like the pigeons...

scurrying in and out of car and buildings

seeking refuge and nourishment

unaware most times that in winter

heaven opens, too

Today, it is going to be 65

a blessing

The colors of autumn are fading

but they are still to be had

I shall walk in the garden today

fill the feeders and birdbaths

rake a bit

and I shall sit

and enjoy your grace

oh dear Lord

for this marvelous day

a day of life

given

So much family stuff going on

the garden has been neglected these past days

But I have a new visitor coming to the door

I thought at first it was Handsome, but alas, it was not to be

Oh how my heart breaks to speak of that old cat

and how I miss him

Truly I miss his grumpy face at the door every morning

insisting on a certain menu

His royal highness, feral cat supreme

I wish to think of him like my cat, Buster,who 16 years ago got out and never returned

I like to think of Handsome with him now, in an old lady's house...keeping her company

giving her hope, and joy and companionship

...say it is so dear Lord...that there is a place as this for lost pets

Now I am the old lady....feeding this rascal

He is very frightened....so by time I get my camera..he is gone

so excuse the bad photo

The hawk was in the yard this morning..I shooed him away

 My granddaughter wanting to know why

He eats my birdies...I tell her

Maybe he's hungry, Grandma

hhhhhhmmmmm.....she's a bit like her grandfather, I see

As we were eating our pancakes ,two cardinals 

arrived on the deck, sitting on little Handsome's bowls

boy and girl

My granddaughter, Reagan, liked this

...so did I

25 pounds of sunflower seeds
5 pounds of unsalted peanuts
apple bits and strawberry tops
and it is not enough
... that damn squirrel
He has violated my pumpkins
or was it the possum?
Maybe he'll carve two eyes and a scarry mouth
by Halloween
you think?

My husband looked out of the window and snickered,
Its always the frogs, he said.
What?
Your lineup out there on the deck.
I looked out and saw what he saw.....the fall lineup...a garden stop
yeah, it does look like the frog is guilty....get your hands above your head
Oh ..so much work putting things away, cleaning up....I welcome a good laugh
But you know....that Stafford 

I have been busy gathering things

to wash and to put away 

until next season of growth

ha...growth..this I have done a lot of this season

It must be the added year that turned a decade for me

Things are in some ways simpler...

I don't worry about this or that anymore

not even in the garden

I have let myself become completely wild

falling in love at every turn of my foot in the garden

Why just this morning I spotted this little cosmos

peeking its head out of the asters

I SEE YOU...I whispered

Oh, it heard me

can't you see its smile?

The geese honked overhead just as I whispered this

to the little flower so brave and true to itself

I looked up and waved

wished them a happy journey

soon I will travel to another place

may I find my voice yet again

maybe even honk a little

So much to do this week

but I must tend to the garden first

It is quickly coming to an end

and all the ladies in this chorus line are doing their thing

It is almost a wild party in the garden

every flower and plant throwing out its last hurrah

before standing naked in leaves

feet frozen to the ground

waiting for a blanket of white

to cover them 

I heard that we are going to have a repeat of last winter

urgh!

..better stock up on birdeseed

I told you I have lots to do...now one more thing just added to my list

wild party in garden

flinging leaves and last flowers

I partner in dance

walking around the garden this morning

the ground covered in wet leaves

I heard an unfamiliar, for here anyway,

the call of a Blue Jay

Do you think it had anything to do with the peanuts

I put out this morning before walking?

How did that rascal spot them so soon?

I followed the sound

and yes, it was a Blue Jay

flying away with his beak full of peanuts

JOY

city farmer

I have always kept this blog about my garden

...a very hard thing to do

How much can one write about the same space
day after day

That is the joy actually..looking

observing,listening,touching, smelling

But I spent the day with my grandson , Finn

and I spotted this growing on his block in the city

Oh I know the heart of that person who set those seeds

and stood back and hoped

bless the city farmer

who can't help himself

the urge to grow so strong

The seeds were cast too late

these will never bare corn

But it is a beacon of hope in a city

sometimes too bleak for many

I hope passersby

partook in its harvest of joy

Blue grace

Yep, she's passing through like a bat out of you know where

shaking the trees until they give in and let go their precious leaves

But there is beauty in the lass

she paints a mean picture

as she shilly shallys through the garden

and when the guy upstairs dips his brush in blue paint

and spreads it across this autumn sky

I just about drop to my knees

bathed in grace

Goldenrod..solidago
so pretty waving in the garden
this time of year
I have learned that goldenrod was a
seasonal indicator plant for the native American tribe Omaha
While on their summer buffalo hunt  :(
it served as a floral calendar... when they saw it
they knew that back home their corn was beginning to ripen

They also used the plant to make a tea to treat heart ailments
and a topical treatment for muscle cramps
and a pain killer for bee stings

Sort of gives you a new respect for this common weed garden plant

yellow goldenrod
the summer hunt is over
a new season stings

Gloomy skies and wet earth greet me on my walk this morning

There is a chill in the air

Last night I noticed how quickly it got dark...where have I been

that I haven't noticed this before?

Soon there will be time for inside things 

of the heart that need contemplating

before a roaring fire or over a hot bowl of soup

or sipping a good glass of wine

Autumn and winter are seasons set forth for quiet growth

and a time to romance ones self

I too, have set seeds like 

the white oak 

Her acorns look almost human like...the tree's destiny clipped to a leaf

that will soon fall to the earth in a blaze of yellow,then

lay dormant in the bitter cold

 under protective snow

waiting for warm days

to awaken it to life

The leaves of the evening primrose

are turning red

and I love it

a cheeriness in a garden that is packing up

letting go

preparing the way

I think I'll wear red today

too

little petal fists

sometimes we hold tight too long

we die unopened

 

a late fall flower
her white gown against their green
bless the late bloomer

last summer walk through the garden with the wee one

I LOVE THESE ASTERS

  DUG FROM A ROADSIDE YEARS AGO

 BROUGHT TO THIS HOUSE

ALMOST 16 YEARS AGO

...THEY HAVE GOTTEN EVEN

 BY JUMPING ALL OVER THE GARDEN

SPREADING THEIR JOYOUS COLOR OF PURPLE

WITH SUNNY YELLOW CENTERS

...anything but the Brier patch

I whisper as I pass by

Ah,Stafford, you newbie to the garden this year

you have done a splendid job of watching over all

your wise look ....of course you're riding on an owl

your face cheers me with its whimsical gaze

Now you must direct the symphony of the leaves

use your fishing pole, my lord

Finn

He has inherited the gene!

a future gardener...a tree hugger

a bug hunter

a rock collector

How can I ever thank Him

for such a gift

to such a wench as I?

I hate to brag...but this autumn joy clematis

is mine

woo me some more

Dear Darby Autumn

Have you ever stepped in chocolate mint?

Finn did...and said m-m-m-m

:)

Oh...and the Finn is a bird watcher, too

pointing to the bushes or trees when he heard them sing or chirp

POOR BOO

HE HAD TO DO HIS BIRDWATCHING FROM INSIDE

the season ages

he claps my hand while walking

autumn holding spring

structure

She's almost naked now,
her shaply figure quickly becoming undressed.
But like me, she is not afraid to be naked,
to stand as a beautiful creation
of God.
For it is what we are made of, not what covers us
this is our structure.
In the end, as we head into the season of winter,
let us stand proudly in our gardens.

The wench has been busy lately

and the garden shows it

but I think it is all right

things are letting go

all on their own

Do you remember last year when in fit of tidiness

I cut the stem of my newly planted Autumn Joy Clematis?

How I cried....wailed.....that I committed murder

and just when it was about to open its flowers?

Well,it has come back!

...remind me to get an arbor or trellis for it next year!

Can you see his ears?

He's hiding in the weed patch

a favorite place...I see him often

as he rushes behind the mugos

for safety..today I guess I snuck up on him

...he froze...and I spoke to him

but he doesn't understand anything but RUN

I guess his mom taught him that

At a bbq on Saturday the host

who had a fabulous garden

told me he shoots rabbits that get near his prize dahlias

my heart broke

the world will always be filled with such

but not in my Open Bar of Joy



the horsechesnut tree

dropping pieces of herself

while setting tight buds

The turning of season

I quarrel with it

aware that it interferes with

acceptance

It's the robins

they have gone

mostly gone

they no longer sing to the rising sun  while on my rooftop

or sing me to sleepiness and slumber in the evening

they too have seen the signs

They go elsewhere

where they can sing and feast

I must do likewise

only mine is a journey to inside setting of buds





This morning

above me

high in the sky

flew a red jet

I remember the day

10 years ago

that all planes were grounded

and I stood with my neighbors

in disbelief

The remembering of this was eerie

the numbness

the heartsickness

the fear

But today, I saw

 a red jet fly overhead

and morning glories that had opened

unaware

The asters are blooming

how I love them

but they signal that time marches on

soon it will be getting darker much sooner and it will be much colder

and the light in the garden will change

But it's all right

I'm ready, in fact, I wait for it.

Ever since the fox came to me

then died near me

Life in the garden has taken on a different tone

The robins are less frequent now...they sing no more

the goldfinches are looking less yellow

I think of my fox and how he chose to die here

His passing... has affected me in the garden

I can see his bones under the deck

a blanket of sadness I have to admit has colored everything

even when I thought it didn't

A reminder how connected we all are

and how death is part of the living experience

now autumn

The season has come to my garden to die

I will watch over it like I did the poor old fox

I will honor its passing

I will go inside

inside

My husband had to go to a retirement party tonight
so I had to handle this fella all by myself
The poor possum was not looking to peppy
So I placed the net handle down the window well
and went inside and opened the window....carefully
The critter was very still
I turned the net toward his body which was huddled in the corner
then  took a long duster and prodded him into the net.....hoop tee do!
Quickly I raised the guy all the way up to the top and let the net go
and so he ran...........

there's a million stories in the naked city
...and this has been one of them                                   :)

Oh my.

Look who fell down into the window well by the lillies

poor little fella

I tried to get him out like I did the muskrat babylast year... with a fishing net....

but this fella played dead

wouldn't move

I put a ladder down there

then went downstairs and opened the window

to see if he'd awake....nope

I slipped in a bowl of water and an apple

oh, and I covered hm with a dark cloth

so he thinks he's hiding and not so exposed

Am I nuts or what?

I think Himself is going to have to help me on this caper

poor little creature

I hope he makes it

Oh the drama of a garden



This is one of those things in the garden that makes me stop 

every time I pass it

The lamb lying down with the lion

Takes trust

As I get older....soon to be 61

I often think

Is this my last garden

Is this my last time of 

seeing it 

smelling it

touching it

tasting it

of loving it?

Yet, I don't worry about it

I trust.

I do love my dodads
Today I spent a bit of time in the garden with Finn
and his Mom
Finn took my hose and went a watering
including himself....grandpa came home for lunch
and joined in the fun...Finn got grandpa's shoe wet
My daughter just sat on the deck watching it all
with a smile...sunlight on her face....
Then she said...mom I love your wind chimes
Which ones? I asked.....Grandpa rolled his eyes
Finn just laughed aiming the hose at his feet
All of them..... she answered
I just love that girl

This is entering the garden on the dark side

shade...I rather love shade

love the plants in early spring that like shade

growing under other plants that are still asleep

Oh this wench feels the pull of certain season change

although today it is to be in the high 90's

oh dear...I think I'll sit right here

and have a glass of cold water with a slice of lemon

and do some sketching today

I sketch..did you know that?

maybe I'll sketch that spider web from yesterday

oh, but that would be sitting in the bright sunlight

no,I'll find something here... right where I am

and that is the secret, isn't it

right here, where we are